a really laugh-riot:----

A distinguished professor was arrested yesterday at Bush Intercontinental Airport in Houston, Texas while trying to board a flight with a calculator, protractor, compass, and slide rule. The security crew immediately searched the elderly man when they saw him boarding with a calculator in his hand. A search of his hand bag revealed the devices. The man was charged with carrying instruments of math instruction.
Further investigation has revealed he is a member of the Al-Gebra terrorist network.